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You can do what you will with my body once I'm out, as long as you don't actually kill me and you stay away from the knives I carved out of William Shatner's father's ilia.

I was hooked on that blackscreamnightmarewhorejunk through the entire godless Bush administration and probably longer. Seeking a single someone clean cut, within my age range, 40's, well-rounded, educated, financially secure, no and sincerely interested in a long-term and committed relationship.

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Tell me a bit about yourself no one liners and send some recent of yourself, looking forward to hearing from you. And I can accept that you will eventually kill me for my wealth and possessions. What rociford do you do?

You can bring a friend--providing they are ok with getting married in the church--and you can play with my snakes. I would like for this to come out of a dating relationship--with an end means of a Christian marriage in the temple--as it would take a lot of trust on both our parts. Never married; no.

I would need to be able to look into your eyes as you're garroting me and know that fick wouldn't go that one step too far, that one second too long and do me in because you're after my knives and my sweet ass camper and all that whole lot of money I have buried in jelly jars beneath it even though the snakes I have guarding it are accustomed to my scent and my scent only and you know how foolish it would be to make a play for my stash without getting them exterminated, and I'd smell the DDT.

So, I need a woman, or women to come into my home and strangle me until I pass out. I'm down-to-earth, ethical, loving asian person who enjoys the travel, good food, and visiting about other cultures.

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It is precious rare. I'm womem to intelligent and humble individuals who are kind and local to the Peninsula. Anyhow, I need some regular sleep hours again and I don't see a way around you choking me to the point that I see the black dragon with my father's face and a burning sword in its teeth, and then pulling back so that I can sleep peacefully. Her ideal person. I sleep fine when I actually go under.

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I have now made peace with that. Send a response if this resonates with you.

But maybe not at all. Probably much longer.

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I am expecting a veritable dickload of replies, so please put, "I want to lure you into a sweet and wonderful marriage based on a horrid lie so that I can get my hands on the bone knives of Jinton Shatner Bill's father and secret them away fick your sweet ass Bellingham camper after inciting the guard vipers to turn on you and then fleeomg to Senegal to live in an underground fortress dug out of a mountain and raise hairless rats for meat and an uprising", so I know you're bringin' the realness on the same level, the same tier as the realness I already done brought.

If you're bored I have some money buried beneath the camper and you should feel free to dig it up and order a pizza--just be sure to massage my throat as it goes down.

Friends describe me as good hearted and dependable, on the spiritual. It's just getting there.